Author’s Aside //1 – “Traveling”

This is the part of the (blogging) program where I start to wonder if using this format to practice and purvey “fiction” was a wise choice because fiction is so darn difficult.  Who knew?! So, while I work up (read: “draft and then cry in despair over while eating a large Peanut Butter Cookie Dough Blizard and wondering why I even try”) the latest edition in the L&T of The Scientist, I offer this observational aside.  Normally, something like this would end being “fictionalized,” but I realize that to keep posting regularly, I need to compromise (cheat?), so I have devised a clever device I’m calling an “Aside.” No one has ever done such a thing, I know.  But, not only do I have superhuman abilities, such as willing my bald spot to stop growing and injuring myself during naps, I have wonderful ideas that no one has ever imagined before! (Oh, and please look up Poe’s Law if you’re wondering if I’m serious or not, because I refuse to use a smiley here!  And thanks for reading.)



Sometimes it’s fun to go to Whole Foods simply for the experience of feeling like you’ve traveled to a different country, if not a different planet. It’s (marginally) cheaper than actually traveling, but it feels just as foreign. You recognize virtually none of the brands, and the prices couldn’t possibly be in American currency.

“Boy, I sure could go for a Snickers, but I guess I’ll have one of these Schnoogens. Sure hope the exchange rate is low because 10 Yuan is kind of steep for a regular-sized Schnoogen. I mean, I MIGHT pay that for a Butterdoodle or even a pack of Happy-Happy Globs, but not for a measly Schnoogen, no sir.”

And then you spot something from back home, like a (3oz) can of Coke or a loaf of sliced white bread, and you get a little misty-eyed, vow to call your mother more often, and start to plan a visit to friends you haven’t seen since you were seven.

It’s the little things, really.  Thanks for the reminder, Whole Foods.



Want more content like these “Asides”? Sign up for the exclusive SRS Update! Oh, here’s the link. You just missed it . . .it’s back there, where it says “link” . . .should be kind of blue.  Sorry, maybe I should have put a button or something. Blogging is hard.

Blogging Shopping Travel

6 Comments Leave a comment

  1. Very funny! I’ve never been to Whole Foods, but I suspect it is a lot like Trader Joe’s. I feel like I need a passport to go there. And I’m not sure what language they speak, but whatever it is, Google Translate doesn’t understand it either.

    • Haha! Yes, I would say that it is a lot like Trader Joes. I think next time, I’ll take my passport to enhance the experience! And maybe whip out google translate to see if I have any luck there. Thanks for the suggestion, and thanks for reading and commenting!

      • My pleasure. I really enjoyed browsing around the aisles of your excellent blog. I’m sure I’ll be back many times. You don’t happen to carry Butterdoodles, do you?

      • Very kind of you, and glad you enjoyed. And, yes, I do carry them (of course), but unfortunately, I am fresh out. I will restock ASAP. In the meantime, could I interest you in a slightly-overpriced Schnoogen? 🙂

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