I Never Get to Sit There!

My kids argue nearly every morning over where they are going to sit in the van on the way to school. Needless to say, the conversations quickly turn irrational. I’m hoping they get over this before they enter the workaday world. I cannot imagine this being a productive practice in, say, an office environment:

“Carl, I was going to sit in that chair.”

“No I’m sitting here.”

“But I’ve wanted to sit in that chair for a long time.”

“But I’m sitting here. You sat here yesterday.”

“No I didn’t.”

“Yes you did. I remember. You got up to get coffee. You bumped everyone around the table on the way out and on the way back. And you spilled coffee on Julie.”

“No that wasn’t me. That was another guy.”

“It was you.”

“Let me sit there!”

“I’m sitting here today. You can sit here next time.”

“I don’t wanna sit there next time, I wanna sit there today!”

(Boss) “Is there a problem gentlemen?”

“Yes, I’ve never sat there before!”

(Boss) “You sit there all of the time.”

“I’ve never sat there in a long time.”

(Boss) “We’ve got to get this meeting started. Is there another chair you could sit in just for today?”

“No I want this chair. Because I’ve. NEVER. SAT. THERE. IN. A LONG. TIME!”

“That doesn’t make sense.”

“Be quiet, Carl!”

(Boss) “If you sit in a different chair today, then I’ll make sure you sit in that chair during our next meeting. Sound good?”

“Okay fine. Move your feet so I can get through, Carl! Hey! Carl stuck his tongue out at me!”

“No I didn’t. My lips were itchy.”

(Boss) “Gracious, guys. Can we get this Executive Leadership Team meeting started now?”

“It’s more like Executive LOSER-ship.”

(Boss) “What was that?”

“Nothing.”

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